School of the Holy Beast

School of the Holy Beast. Well, two simple words: Japanese Nunsploitation. If those two words don't make you want to see the film, you are broken. Or, possibly, if those two words make you want to see the film, you're broken. Just a quick rundown of what depravity is in the film: hockey, discos, arcades, insane amounts of nun-sex, more gratuitous attractive-nun-nudity than you could shake a stick at, nun-hay-baling, nun-fights, nun-lesbianism, synchronized-nun-bathing, nun-incest, insinuated-nun-oral-sex (licking between two fingers... real subtle there), nun-bondage, nun-burning-in-acid, pregnant-nun-hanging, nun-pissing-on-a-crucifix (again with that... oh well...), nun-rape, nun-sausage-eating, evil-nun-cat, nun-sado-masochism, nun-porn, nun-masturbation, nun-whippings, nun-rose-whippings, nun-self-flagellation, nun-bell-ringing, and nuns. Oh, and blaming God for both the Holocaust and the atomic bombs being dropped. But the thing that makes the film stand out is the direction and use of crazy camera angles. Who knew that an exploitation film could be quite that visually interesting without naked flesh on the screen? It's utterly ridiculous, and if I were at all religious, I'd probably be extremely offended. As I'm not, I was pretty much just happy that movies like this existed. Because someone out there likes sadomasochistic lesbian pissing nuns. I imagine. Not me. If films like this didn't exist, I imagine the world would be a much, much worse place. Or better, if you're all religious or something. Oh, and it's based on a manga. Yay for comic-based movies. It's quite a bit better than The Punisher. Either version.