The Door in the Floor, Splendor in the Grass, Hell House, Catwoman, & Children of a Lesser God

The Door in the Floor was really depressing. Well, it's like a John Irving novel that doesn't actually have the final happy ending. Mainly because it's only of the first third of the book. I didn't even realise that the book was about the daughter until I read up on it. Still, it was very good and Kim Basinger and Jeff Bridges were excellent. Just a little depressing for me.

Splendor in the Grass has a very attractive Warren Beatty and Natalie Wood. Just made me pretty happy that most people aren't quite that repressed now. Another depressing movie. Also somewhat suprised at how much they showed of Natalie Wood. Clearly the Hays Code office forgot to censor the movie.

Hell House was another depressing movie. But mainly because there are a bunch of seriously misguided people out there who think that they're the only ones who are right. And that everyone else is going to burn in hellfire for ever and ever. The people there who were trying to figure out the evil things that they were trying to convince people to avoid just goes to show that they don't understand anything. They lead sheltered lives without any actual contact with these sinners they're trying to convert. Admittedly the "other side" in the movie was a bunch of foul-mouthed idiots, but seeing the visitors' reactions to the rooms was painful. Are there that many people who believe that Ru-486 will lead to a painful and bloody abortion? Are there that many people who believe that raves lead to rapes? And who thinks that the internet will lead to adultery and spousal abuse? In the end, the movie is frustrating for me, because it comes so close to damning these "religious" types, except that I actually liked a lot of them. Certainly not the leaders, most of whom were attention whores. But the others were mainly misguided people, who would have been normal if you avoided the religion or politics potholes in conversation. That's what's most scary to me.

Catwoman was crap. Nothing remotely redeeming. Maybe if I actually liked Halle Berry at all, I might have enjoyed her in skimpy clothes. And the CGI was some of the worst in an allegedly big budget film in years.

Children of a Lesser God has a very good performance from both Marlee Matlin and William Hurt and was well done. But it never really overcomes the problem of being a movie about a man and a woman, one has a serious problem, overcoming the problem. Plus, this had some horrible 80s music.

The Verdict, True Believer, The Believer, The Girl Who Knew Too Much, & High Society

The Verdict had a great performance from Paul Newman and an interesting David Mamet script. Too bad that it's a typical lawyer gets a last chance at redemption plot. Well done, but nothing too special. Good cast though.

True Believer has a good performance from James Woods as a former idealistic civil rights lawyer who defends a Korean accused of murdering to join a gang. I decided I was going to have a little themed string of movies, with these two lawyer getting back to their jobs. Then I went for the next movie because of their similar titles. Robert Downey Jr. was also pretty good, and Kurtwood Smith is one of those That Guy guys. I never remembered his name.

The Believer was really good, and Ryan Gosling was very good. Billy Zane will always be funny (The Phantom stars Billy Zane, which very few people will get). Interesting and fascinating look at self-hating Jews, and watching the interview with the writer-director made it a little less offensive, but it explained the movie well. Probably not as interesting to a non-Jew, but just a good movie.

The Girl Who Knew Too Much I saw is not, repeat not, the Adam West film from 1969. I saw the Mario Bava film with John Saxon (my favorite actor I've met, on the set of a Nike commercial in 1999). Hitchcock ripoff, and it had too many non-sensical aspects. Plus, it felt very long at less than 90 minutes. Boring. And there were scratches on the DVD print.

High Society was a musical remake of Philadelphia Story, with Grace Kelly, Bing Crosby, and Frank Sinatra replacing Katharine Hepburn, Cary Grant, and James Stewart. Plus, the entire rest of the cast wasn't as good as the original either. The best bits were the parts directly from the original. And as hot as Grace Kelly is, she's no Katharine Hepburn from 1940. Well, actually, Grace Kelly is one of the most attractive women ever, but Charles Walters just can't make her as attractive as Hitchcock was able to.

Portastatic 10/17 The Black Cat

Truckstop Cassettes
Chesepeake
Through with People
Paratrooper
Cunning Latch
Rock and Roll Friend (Go-Betweens)
Full of Stars
White Wave
Autumn was a Lark
I Wanna Know Girls
Noisy Night
San Andreas

I think Rock and Roll Friend was played somewhat later in the set, but I could be wrong. Sort of hard to remember setlists when you're too busy bouncing along, even if you are singing along to every track. But I'm pretty sure that's everything. I also wanted to say just how amazing the rocking version of Paratrooper was.

Somehow this was the first Portastatic show I'd actually been to, and it was a hell of a lot more like a Superchunk show than I was expecting. Which was awesome. I would like to apologize to Margaret and Jim for being such a total fanboy after the set, but there are just times when I'm too bouncy even at 11 on a Monday night after a long day of work and a couple hours in a smoke-y club.

I stuck around for a few John Vanderslice songs, but it was late. And the opening act was some group that I can't remember. And I'm too lazy to find out who it was.

Lost in America & Alien Vs. Predator

Lost in America was funny and insightful, but I imagine I'd have liked it more were I a rich person in the mid-80s. The scene with Albert Brooks trying to convince the casino manager to give him back his nest egg was worth watching the movie for.

Alien Vs. Predator ruined both franchises. Well, it would have had Alien not ruined itself with Alien: Resurrection, which Joss Whedon is still paying for. Too bad I'm more and more convinced that it's the executives' choice of Jeunet as director that screwed up that movie. Could have been a good movie. AVP was doomed from the instant Paul W.S. Anderson was attached to do anything for the movie. What a blight upon the name Paul Anderson. At least Joss Whedon is no longer responsible for writing the worst Alien film. And it's definitely the worst Predator film, as I sort of like Predator 2, and little is as goofy as a Schwarzennegger film. Anyway, Lance Henriksen could be completely wasted in this movie, even if the Weyland thing was nice. Too bad it made no sense. Wasn't the Bishop in Alien 3 the real one? Why the hell did it have to take place in the present day? So many wasted opportunities in this movie. Too many of them were unfortunately made too early for it.

The Corner, Veronica Mars Season 1, & Blood for Dracula

The Corner was excellent. And depressing. And excellent. But very, very depressing. The depressingness was redeemed somewhat by the epilogue filmed in the present day (as of the filming). Very good performances from everyone. Especially the makeup team who really freaked me out with those infected track marks. Much freakier than Requiem for a Dream. Took me a while to figure out when it was set. Or maybe I just missed that somewhere. Also strange to see Daniels and Freamon being drug addicts. When DeAndre was talking back to Marvin, I just wanted him to stand up and be all threatening like in the Wire. Man I miss that show.

Veronica Mars Season 1 was really good. Sort of wound up all the loose ends, but I'm sure that when I finally get around to watching the second season I'll have those loose ends become much bigger. I didn't like the fight scene at the end, as it was sort of a cop-out after that great season. And it was great to see Kyle Secor and Harry Hamlin being very creepy and threatening. I also liked the little Clash of the Titans references. I know that movie is terrible, but man, I just really like it. And anything that reminds me of Homicide is good. Very well plotted and only somewhat strained a little bit of believability.

Blood for Dracula has a great scenery chewing performance from Udo Kier and a horrendously bad New York accent by Joe Dallesandro after every other character has at least some sort of European one. I know it's silly to complain because it's not like it's the only movie where his accent is completely out of place. At least we have Udo Kier turning different colors and saying "wirgins" (and, of course, the flesh wounds at the end). And there's Joe Dallesandro being both a communist and a vampire expert. Somehow. Plus, he likes taking the characters virginity in rough ways. Not exactly the best hero for the movie. I was also annoyed by the messing with the vampire mythology, but I guess very few things have it all down to my exacting standards. And the incestuous lesbianism seemed completely unnecessary. "Wirgins". Hee. The subtext of vampirism being about not only sex but also class was an added touch I liked though. "Wirgins" though. Still can't help giggling at that.

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, Ocean's Twelve, & Memories of Murder

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy probably would have sucked much harder if I actually remembered more of the book. Or had listened to the radio show. Or something. It's just sort of bleh, with some interesting ideas, and it seemed more like an attempt to remind everyone of something really funny than an actual movie. Plus, Sam Rockwell was so damn annoying. Was Zaphod that annoying in the book? I'd probably have to reread it to find out. I actually enjoyed parts of it, but overall it was just pointless. Better to just read the book. Or something other than watch this.

Ocean's Twelve was not as fun as the first, but something must be said for a movie that can make me smile like a moron for a large portion of the movie. And Topher Grace is extremely enjoyable. It took me a while to figure out who was playing the Nighthawk, but the entire cast looked like they were having a blast, and the final scene just confirmed it. Here's the thing that people complaining about the movie don't really understand: the first movie was masterfully made fluff. This was just not as well made fluff. Still fun, but not as good as the last one. Very pretty cast and very pretty locations.

Memories of Murder is a pretty by the book serial killer movie, although being about South Korea around the time of the first elections gives it an added kick. The main two policemen are also good in this. The female officer seems to be there only when needed for the story, while the movie has this feeling of being very Korean, but like every American serial killer film: obsessed with seeing dead women and having them be horribly murdered. Admittedly, many serial killers are obsessed with killing women. Being based on a true event, however, adds extra weight to scenes, even if I don't know enough Korean history to know how accurate it all is. That they never found the killer makes it all worse.

A History of Violence & Fresh

A History of Violence is gory, graphic, and great. Viggo and Maria are excellent, and Ed Harris is very threatening. And it's nice to see William Hurt get a fun role. The theater was packed, and we were stuck in the first row of the theater. I could almost see the entire screen at once. I really hate it, and my neck is still a little sore. Plus, seeing that gore so huge really messed with me. I'm also not sure about seeing Mario Bello's pubes so big on the screen either (well, not that she had a lot of pubes, but that I was very close to a big screen). Also a little disturbing to have the entire audience dissolve into giggles during the first sex scene. Admittedly, it starts out sort of funny, but giggling at a 69 position? Are they laughing because they don't expect to see that in a mainstream movie or something? What? And that brutal sex scene on the stairs? Why laugh at that? Doesn't make any sense. Cronenberg directs the action scenes very well, and it's definitely effective.

Fresh has a great performance from Sean Nelson. I need to see The Corner a bunch. And damn if Samuel L. Jackson isn't one of the best actors out there. His few scenes are very effective. It's just a great movie, and made me feel like I was watching part of the Wire. When the hell is season 3 coming out? Back to Fresh, and Giancarlo Esposito, who needs more good work. But as good as the adults are, and Esposito and Jackson are very good, Sean Nelson is so damn good that he actually outshines everyone. And he is much younger than everyone else in it. He was 13-ish when it was filmed, but he just controls this film and every scene he's in. Some of this is clearly a result of Boaz Yakin and his directing and writing talent for this film. A little flashier than I would like, not nearly enough like David Simon attached projects, but still good. That it's almost all chess based just adds to the attraction of the movie.

L.I.E. & Champagne for Caesar

L.I.E. was a pretty depressing and dark movie about pederasts. And some strong acting from the two leads. But it's such a sick movie that I didn't really care for it. I'd write more but that would require discussing some of the sick stuff that happens in it. And Brian Cox again is really good.

Champagne for Caesar. Well, that's the last time I listen only to that friend's movie recommendations. If I hadn't heard of the movie otherwise or read something positive, I'm not going to listen. I have other friends whose recommendations I listen to, but not him anymore. Sort of ok, sort of funny, but I'm not sure what is going on with anyone thinking it's brilliant or anything. Vincent Price still rocks hard, but I just wasn't too impressed. Plus, the DVD was crap. The menu audio was too loud, there were lots of scratches, and at least two parts where the video cuts out. Who makes a DVD with that many problems?

Serenity

Serenity was really, really good. I loved it, felt extremely pissed that Fox cancelled Firefly all over again (although there never would have been the nether regions line on TV, which was great and it really made me love Kaylee even more), and was extremely sad about the characters who died. I can't believe he killed them, but then again, that's typical Whedon. Always killing his characters. River kicking ass was pretty damn cool, and her just walking around showed Summer's ballet training. I think everyone should see this movie, after watching Firefly, and then Joss Whedon's brilliance will be finally accepted by the masses. Yeah, I cried and was shaking all through the final battle scenes due to a death seconds before, but it also could have been that I was soaked due to the pouring rain. I saw it with a friend who had seen half the episodes, and one who'd seen none, and they both loved it, so maybe people can see it and then they'll go and give Joss more money, but damn if they won't do better with it if they've seen the show.

Now, I'd discuss the characters who die, but I don't want to spoil anyone. So don't read this unless you've already seen the movie. SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER. Killing off Book and Wash actually makes some sense, at least Book really does, since he never really fit in the rest of the show, but he did finally have his backstory explained, in a very roundabout way. That he was an Operative before hiding out and becoming a shepherd explains a hell of a lot. And I love that Whedon didn't bother to explain that, although it would have been missed by anyone who wasn't familiar with the show. Killing Wash, however, really sucked. He was my favorite character, and seeing Alan Tudyk die just blew. Really, really blew. Maybe with his newfound success as the pirate, he was becoming too famous for it. And they couldn't kill Zoe, or Mal, or Kaylee, or Simon, or River, so it was pretty much between Jayne, Wash, and Inara. Zoe is black and too kickass, Mal is the star, Kaylee just rocks everything, Simon and River are needed for plot purposes. Inara was Mal's love interest, so there goes her, Jayne is Adam Baldwin, a big star and the real muscle for the crew, plus he's funny. Wash... Wash was just my favorite character and funny and the pilot. But he was the most expendable of the rest of the main cast. Still hurts like hell.

Arrested Development 3.3, Gilmore Girls 6.4, & Felicia's Journey

Arrested Development 3.3. Is AD the funniest show on TV? It just may be. A show that can turn roofies into a hilarious thing is great. A show that comes up with Bob Loblaw as a character name is absolutely brilliant. But really, any show that comes up with the idea of combining an analyst and a therapist and coming up with analrapist is really going so far into funny as possibly being the funniest thing on TV. I really hate that baseball is going to preempt it for four weeks, and if the rumor is true that it may not be back, I will try never to watch another Fox show ever again. Mismanaging and not fully supporting Arrested Development is actually pissing me off more than them screwing any of their other shows I've loved. I really need to go buy the first two seasons on DVD. Really. But I really just need to stop giggling everytime I think of analrapist and Bob Loblaw. Actually, I'm going to go purchase the first two now, since Amazon is giving me another $10 off to get both. That'll give me the excuse to get the new Franz Ferdinand as well. Damn spending so much on music and DVDs. Damnit.

Gilmore Girls 6.4 needed a little more something. There was something wrong with it. Oh, yeah. Sookie and Jackson. And Jackson's family. They all suck. However, they did use the word snarcastic which is clearly the greatest word in the new English language. And I have tremendous lurve for that computer. I need that $9k G5. So very much.

Felicia's Journey features an extremely strong and very creepy performance from Bob Hoskins. And some interesting camerawork and strange soundtrack. Elaine Cassidy was also great. The entire movie just freaked me out. Extremely off-putting. Even with all that, it may be one of Atom Egoyan's best films. Just the weirdness and the occasional dragging bits keep it from being his best. Plus, I really hate proselytizers.

Rome 1.6, Curb Your Enthusiasm 5.2, & Extras 1.2

Rome 1.6 was my personal favorite episode yet. Three classic lines. "For that price, she'd better fuck like Helen of Troy with her ass on fire", "If Triton can't keep me any drier than this, he can suck my cock!", and the best one was "A large penis is always welcome". Size queen much? Niobe's kid is clearly too young for all this. Octavian is great. Atia is such a slut. And a terrible person to boot. Now, historical accuracy may be damned, but I may be enjoying the show more.

Curb Your Enthusiasm 5.2 had a great dog, and a great plot with the lesbian and black underground messaging. Hilarious. Wondering about the season arc, but there are probably some threads that have been in the shows so far. And that guy with the stutter made the episode, because really, a guy with a stutter screaming obsceneties is funny, and doing it at Larry David is even better.

Extras 1.2 was somewhat funny, especially the ending scene with Ben Stiller and Andy's Stiller baiting, but severely suffers from comparisons with the Office. It needs more characters than Andy and Maggie. It needs characters who aren't worthless. I'm also extremely disappointed that they're showing these out of order in the US. So this was actually 1.1, and last week was 1.3. What the hell? HBO normally respects their shows. What the hell?

I, Robot

I, Robot was actually somewhat interesting for a big budget Hollywood action film. Too bad the action scenes were blah at best. And it ruined any chance at making other Asimov stories into movies. I also wonder why there was the need for matching male and female shower scenes. Not that I'm really complaining. Not about Will Smith. Just about supporting gratuitous male nudity if there's going to be gratuitous female nudity. Alan Tudyk was again wasted, by not actually being in the movie. Asimov's stories in I, Robot may not make particularly good movies, but they're fascinating. Alex Proyas made it more interesting than it otherwise would be.

Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story & Tin Men

Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story was blah. Occasionally funny, sometimes just so ridiculous you had to laugh. But really, just homophobic and too ridiculous. The Deus Ex Machina treasure chest was about right for the movie. I wanted more Alan Tudyk. More Wash would have been a good thing.

Tin Men. Fine Young Cannibals? What the hell? The other music was vintage, but Fine Young Cannibals don't belong in a movie about 1963 Baltimore aluminum siding salesmen. What an amazing cast, with some of my favorite character actors, like Bruno Kirby, J.T. Walsh, Seymour Cassell, and John Mahoney, along with a very good Barbara Hershey, Danny DeVito, and Richard Dreyfuss. Plus, it's like an extension of Levinson's other Baltimore films, meaning that I enjoyed it.

Auntie Mame & the Young Girls of Rochefort

Auntie Mame was... an episodic movie that felt like it was about to burst into song at any moment, but it never did. Plus, the butler was a terrible stereotype, not as bad as in Breakfast at Tiffany's, but still pretty offensive. Plus, at least half the episodes sucked. Only a strong performance from Rosalind Russell makes me not regret watching it. And I'm still mainly regretting it, but I'm regretting reading all the positive reviews. I have read reviews that Lucille Ball's version is even worse. I know replacing Russell with Ball is enough to doom anything for me.

The Young Girls of Rochefort was fluff, and not nearly as good as the Umbrellas of Cherbourg, and not even an operetta (when I first heard talking, I was disappointed). Seeing George Chakiris singing and dancing was nice as well, even if no one actually sang for themselves (besides Danielle Darrieux and Kelly). I recognized some of Kelly's moves from his earlier movies, and he was great. Colors were just as good, Deneuve just as attractive, but there was no depth. That bittersweet aspect of Cherbourg made it much more than just a musical. However, this has Gene Kelly, and the long takes that make a musical a musical. To show that they're actually dancing. And they really can dance. Just wished for more plot. Well, less murderer subplot and more depth.